Replacing Undesirable Behaviors

When consulting with a mother of a child with Down Syndrome, she confided that she struggles with a very undesirable behavior the child exhibits.  He tends to scream at the top of his lungs in quiet places.  Therefore, taking her son to places such as the local library, her church, a restaurant or even a grocery store can be a very difficult trip for her.  I introduced her to the idea of replacing the undesirable behavior with something more socially appropriate.  But how do we do this?

Here are my basic rules when attempting to replace an undesirable behavior:

1.  Find a behavior the child can already do.  When replacing an undesirable behavior with something more socially appropriate, we do not want to spend time on trying to TEACH a new behavior if we have a perfectly acceptable behavior in something the child can already do.

For example, when I worked in the school setting, I had several PK students who wanted to climb on, hug or cuddle with teachers.  Although a hug here and there is necessary and a great way to boost our little ones confidences, we must remember that there are certain times when this behavior just isn't acceptable.  Circle time just doesn't work if everyone in the PK classroom wants to sit in the teacher's lap.  So we attempted to replace this behavior with a quick "compliment and high five".  This way each child was given individualized attention. The teacher or myself told each student something we really liked about their behavior that day (e.x. "Johnny, I really loved how you helped clean up the books earlier!") and they still received some physical contact with a "high five" before they were asked to sit on the floor.  We began with something the students could do without spending valuable time teaching a new behavior.


2.  Find something that motivates the child.  Again, remember your goal is just to eliminate the undesirable behavior as quickly as possible.  So to do this, we must find something that is MORE motivating than the current behavior.  If this replacement behavior is NOT more motivating, than it will NOT stick!  So really watch your students, know what makes them tick, and see what puts that light of excitement into their eyes.

For the little child with Down Syndrome above, he delighted in hearing his voice echo in quiet places.  He also enjoyed the attention his mother gave him after each scream when she looked at him and told him "sh" or "no".  So I noticed that he could use a pincer grasp to hold on to items AND he liked cool sounds.  Therefore, I suggested his mother get him a quiet book with LOTs of pictures to pull from velcro patches.  Each time he pulled a picture off the velcro, she was to give him quiet praise to feed his desire for parental attention.  The fun velcro sound would still delight him, while it was much quieter than his screams.  In addition, simple books such at these never run out of fun because you can simply return all the pictures to their velcro patches and he can begin again.

3.  Practice before "game day".  We know practice makes perfect but we are not trying to be perfect here.  We are just trying to replace a undesirable behavior with something a bit more socially acceptable.  As a child ages we can shape these behaviors into the "desired" behavior, the ultimate goal.  Yet in the meantime, an acceptable behavior will do.  But we cannot expect our children to be ready to substitute these behaviors if we do not practice them.  Practice your replacement behavior when is it not needed and your student will know how to perform them when it is.

For our little guy, practicing his quiet book at home for a few minutes a day, helps prepare him for his next library trip.

4.  You may need an external motivator.  Remember when working with cognitively delayed children you may realize, during your practice sessions, that the replacement behavior is NOT motivating enough.  However, if you couple that replacement behavior with an external motivator (E.x. Your student pulls all pictures off the velcro patches of a quite book then receives one goldfish as a snack), you may have a very compliant student on your hands.

5.  Over time fade out external motivators and/or find new replacement behaviors that are closer to desired behavior.  Over time you can begin to fade out your external motivator by providing them less often and inconsistently.  You can also spend time creating a repertoire of various socially appropriate replacement behaviors to keep interest and motivation high.  In addition, you can think about ways to shape these replacement behaviors to get the child to exhibit behavior closer and closer to the ultimately desired behavior.

For example, with our little guy who loves to scream, once we replace the screaming with quiet books and possible snacks, we may want to shape this behavior to using the quiet book independently in his own chair, rather than while being held by mom.  We may eventually want to practice using these replacement behavior for longer and longer periods of time at the local library, church or restaurant.  See how long we can extend the use of the replacement behaviors before the child looses attention or motivation.  The longer we extend the behaviors and the more we increase the independence with which a child uses the replacement behavior, the closer we will come to the desired behavior.

So these are my basic rules for replacement behaviors.  Remember it may take some trial and error before you find that one thing your student enjoys doing enough to replace an undesirable behavior.  But when you do, know you have struck gold. Run with it and soon you will be seeing a whole new side of your students.

Have you spent time replacing behaviors in the past? Feel free to share your experiences below to help others.

Happy Talking!

Expressive Vocabulary Repertoire: Basis for Qualification?

I recently had a discussion with a colleague regarding qualification of speech therapy based solely on the number of expressive vocabulary words a child uses.

When working with very young children (under age 5), we understand the range of "typical development" can be very large.  So when I assess these children, I do want to have an accurate picture of the number of expressive vocabulary words a child uses. However I also want to take into account other things that will give me a holistic view of the child's expressive language skills.  So I ask myself (and the parents/guardians as necessary) these questions:

1. Does the child use language for a variety of social purposes (labeling, requesting objects, requesting actions, requesting assistance, greeting others, initiating/terminating activities, protesting, etc.)?
2. Does the child use various types of words (nouns, verbs, adjectives, greetings, negatives, etc.)?
3. Does the child combine words together into 2-3+ word phrases and create novel word combinations?
4. Does the child exhibit periods of time (3+ months) where he/she ceases to learn new words?
5. Does the child cease to use previously known and used words?

If I can answer "yes" to questions 1-3, than I am fairly confident this child is developing language naturally yet he/she may simply be on the low average end of the "typical range" when looking at expressive vocabulary repertoire.

However, if I answer "yes" to questions 4-5 than I cannot ignore that there may be some underlying issues affecting language development and will either recommend further assessment or suggest treatment if determined appropriate.

So, how much stock should we take in expressive vocabulary inventory?  We certainly should take some stock in it as it does give us a guide and starting point into understanding a child's expressive language skills.  However it alone is not adequate to determine the existence of a delay or disorder.  Therefore we must continue to take a holistic approach to assessment and we most certainly should be asking ourselves the above questions when analyzing our results and determining if further services are needed.

Happy talking!

"How to get my infant to talk" Series Posts

In case you missed any, here are the links to all the posts in this series:

Tip #1: Talk to them

Tip #2: Read Often and Repeatedly

Tip #3: Bring Attention to Your Face

Tip #4: Imitate Your Baby

Tip #5:  Be Your Child's 1st Toy!

Tip #6:  Create Play Routines

Tip #7:  Use Music

Tip #8:  Use Pictures or Baby Signs

If you are looking for more parent friendly language facilitation techniques, please check out Language Facilitation Strategies: Parent Handouts. 

Enjoy and happy talking!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #8!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Here is my final tip in this series!  If you missed any previous tips, you can find them all posted here!

Tip #8:

Use pictures or baby signs.  I know, you have been wondering when I was going to bring this up weren't you?  Well there are a number of studies that have been done which support the use of basic early signs to facilitate language development in young children.  

I will tell you that my oldest was very adept at making gross motor approximations to a number of basic common signs ("more, done, help", etc.) which supported his speech productions for these basic words.  My second child is not interested in looking at, imitating or attending to my models of signs. The reason I share this with you is because as SLPs, we advocate early use of sign often, but as a mother, I also understand that some children will benefit from the use of sign and some babies are just "not that into it" or do not have the motor skills for sign use.  You know your child best and sign may or may not be the way to go.

Pictures:  Another option is the use of pictures to support communication.  Simply take real pictures of objects, foods, etc. your child enjoys and provide him/her with two choices.  First, introduce the pictures with the real items.  Verbally label the objects as you match up the object with its picture.  Present the pictures with real objects several times until you feel your baby understands that the object is represented by the picture.

I know what you are thinking.  Can a baby understand that a picture represents an object? Of course they can.  Think about the simple words books you have have at home full of photographs of common objects you read to your baby.  This is how your baby learns what words mean (we SLPs like to be fancy and call words "object labels").

Once you feel your baby associates the photo with the object you can begin to use these pictures as a means to have your baby make requests.  If your child has use of both the left and right hands you can place one picture to the left and one to the right and see which picture your child chooses.  I have seen very young children make their preferences known via eye gaze (looking at the picture of the object they want), reaching, slapping on the side of the table that holds the picture of his/her choice and also taking pictures of choice out of parents hands.  I'm sure there are other ways a child could make his/her preferences known.  Follow your baby's lead and respond to whatever means of communication (verbal or nonverbal) your baby uses.  Remember to immediately respond with rewarding your child with the chosen object.

How does it work?  How will signs or pictures encourage my baby's speech production?  You always pair the word with the sign/picture.  Over time when your child is making requests you will expect them to pair a vocalization with sign/picture.  This way you are encouraging vocabulary development as well as speech production.

Well this concludes our "How to get my infant to talk" series.  If you are looking for more parent friendly language facilitation techniques, please check out Language Facilitation Strategies: Parent Handouts.  

Thank you for sticking with this summer series.  

Enjoy your babies and remember to just have fun!  Happy talking!!!!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #7!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Tip #7 (here's Tip #6):

Use Music.  Music can be a GREAT way to introduce new vocabulary as well as keep your child entertained.  So what do I do, just play children's CDs?  Well children CDs are great and I recommend playing them for your children, but I also recommend taking the time to sing these familiar children's songs to your child for a number of reasons.  Firstly, you can sing as fast or as slowly as your child requires to aid in his/her understanding of the language.  Secondly, you can repeat favorite songs or songs your child does not seem to understand often in order to improve his/her comprehension of various language concepts.  Thirdly, you can use hand motions or props to aid your child's understanding.

Dancing is just fun and adds some great gross motor input to the activity.  Some children (my oldest is like this) improve attention, memory and retention skills simply involving another part of the brain (i.e. motor cortex).  Simply by adding some dance moves (carrying baby and dancing with him/her or if your baby can stand, having him/her bounce up and down) and/or finger plays along with music, your child's attention and motivation to participate in music play may improve.

Rhythm play is simply finding ways you can clap, bang on drums, shake rattles, tambourines, or rainsticks etc. to the beat of the music when you sing or play the CDs.  Rhythm play is a great way to incorporate development of prosody to your child's play.

How can music help my baby talk?  Well, singing is a great way to encourage various pitch and sound productions.  Simply singing parts of "Old MacDonald" your baby will be encouraged to produce long vowels "E, I, O" as well as animal sounds.  By reciting the Alphabet song, your child will be developing his/her ability to recall letters.  By singing "Apples and Bananas" your child can begin to play with various vowels within the same surrounding consonant combinations as speech develops.

Tip:  When using music, I recommend paying attention to the songs your baby seems to enjoy the most and be sure to repeatedly sing them over for days and even weeks.  As long as your baby is still enjoying the song, keep signing it.  If your baby is not attempting to hum, vocalize or imitate sounds while you sing, try slowing down and singing at a much slower pace.  You may just be singing too quickly for your baby to keep up.  You can also use the delayed response technique, where you sing the first line and second line of a familiar song without singing the last word, then wait expectantly to let your baby know it's time for him/her to vocalize for you to continue singing.

Why does it work?  Not all children learn the same way so adding music, dancing, and even some rhythm play can have positive effects on language development, speech production and prosody.

Check out Tip #8 here!

Happy taking and singing!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #6!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Here's Tip #6 (you can find Tip #5 here):

Create play routines.  This naturally flows when you are being your child's plaything.  You can do this with fun songs, finger plays or favorite activities of baby.  Play routines are simply predictable play exchanges.  These are things you are doing over and over and over again in the same manner to allow your baby to begin to predict and anticipate your next action based on previous exchanges. I know what your thinking.  Can I create a play routine with a baby?  Yes, you can do this with very young babies as well as children of any age as long as you being by following baby's lead and performing actions that are highly motivating and repeated in a predictable manner.  Examples might be:  giving "high fives", playing peek-a-book, pat-a-cake, hide and seek, "How big is baby?...So big!", etc.

Tip:  With babies, keeping play routines simple with few or no other toys can aid in improving the baby's attention to you as his/her communication partner in this play.  Also keeping play routines vocally simply by adding only one or two words repeatedly helps baby to focus on routine specific vocabulary.

Side note: Do you need more ideas for play routines?  Check out the book My Toddler Talks, by Kimberly Scanlon.  It is chock full of great ideas for play routines.

So how does a play routine help my infant to talk?  Well play routines can 1) improve understanding (we SLPs call this "receptive vocabulary") for simple words you repeatedly use in play, 2) encourage spontaneous vocalizations from your baby during play (I'll explain how to do this below), and 3) encourage imitations or close approximations of simple words used.

Tip: I encourage spontaneous vocalizations during play routines with these three simple steps: 1) find and participate in a play routine your baby enjoys, 2) use no more than 2 words repeatedly (e.g. "peek-a-boo" I use only "boo", Up/down on lap I use "uuuUUUUP" and "DDDdddooowwn"), 3) after you notice your baby is anticipating your next action, begin to pause until baby makes a sound, then immediately reinforce that sound by performing that action.  Over time the spontaneous vocalizations will become structured and repeated and shaped more closely to the sounds in the words you are using for your play routine.

Why does it work?  Creating these simple but predictable play routines, provides a structured exchange for your baby.  This exchange, although done in a playful manner, imitates a conversational exchange, and can easily facilitate vocalizations and speech production as explained above.  Remember, children learn first through play so make it fun!

Check out Tip #7 here!

Happy talking and playing!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #5!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Tip #5 (you can find Tip #4 here):

Be your child's first toy!  Um, what?  Ok this sounds more difficult than it really is.  All you need to do is follow your baby, see what interests him/her and play with those objects or perform those actions to engage your child.  If your baby smiles and shows enjoyment, continue to do this over and over and over again.  You may see your baby laugh and you may even begin to see your baby anticipate your action.  Some good examples of this might be:  blowing raspberries on baby's belly, flying baby, laying baby "down" then bringing baby back "up" while sitting on your lap, shaking rattles or clapping hands when baby vocalizes, tickling baby, etc.

I know it can be difficult to think of ways in which you can become your child's plaything so, in addition to the above examples, allow me to share a few ways in which I have been my children's toy in the past.  My oldest used to cover me up and uncover me with pillows, covers, socks, (whatever he had at the time) to "find" me when he was a toddler.  My body has also been used as a racetrack, a limbo stick, a bridge, a jungle gym, and a basketball net. My legs have been ramps for rolling balls or racing trucks/cars.  My hands have been used as a canvas when my son decided to paint them rather than his paper.  My head has fashioned a number of wonderful stylish objects such as empty boxes, mega blocks, cars, bibs, and books.  I've been dressed up as Iron man, Captain America, Bumblebee, and Optimus Prime (usually only with the helmets as I can't fit in the actual costumes).  I am the builder when my sons want to knock down stacking blocks, the jumperroo when my baby wants to strengthen his legs on my thighs, a doggie, a monkey, a snake, a shark and a number of other animals when my boys want me to chase/capture them.

What is my point to all this?  No matter how ridiculous, tiresome or tedious it seems, if your child is into it, it's worth doing with him/her.  But your child will only continue to participate in this play as long as you make it fun and exciting.  You cannot just sit there and let your child play around you.  You must become PART of the play.  So remember to be over the top with huge facial experiences, varied pitches, and don't forget to laugh.  Laugh loudly and laugh often.

You can become your child's plaything in any place and at any time (in play, at bath time, at meal time, when doing household chores, when shopping, etc.), simply remember to follow your child's lead and do what interests and motivate him/her.

Why does it work?  You are not only showing baby you are his/her communication partner, but you are showing baby that you can take into account baby's likes and dislikes and can create fun play with that in mind.  Also, by being your child's toy, you will be making social connections with your baby that you may not have made in the past.  Be exciting.  Be animated.  Be fun!!!!  You are continuing to encourage joint attention as well as encouraging social interaction.

Check out Tip #6 here!

Happy talking and playing!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #4!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Tip #4 (you can find Tip #3 here):

Imitate your baby.  What does that mean?  When your baby begins to move his mouth, make raspberries, hums, growls, or begins to babble (with open vowels--"ah", "oh", "e"--or early developing sounds, "b, m, d, t", etc.), you want to take those opportunities to model your baby.  By modeling your baby's movements or vocalizations, you are showing him/her that what he/she is doing and/or saying is important.

When modeling baby, you want to be silly and just have fun with it.  You want to become a play thing for your child!  The more enjoyable your imitations are to your baby, the more he/she will continue participating in this game.  As your baby's participation in imitation games increases and lengthens in duration, the more repeated practice with oral motor movements and already developing sounds your child will receive.  In addition, it will increase the chances your baby will produce variations of the same sound or different and new sounds.

Why it works?  You are simply creating a reciprocal communicative exchange by imitating your baby.  Very quickly your baby will begin to "take turns" with you during this play which models how we take turns in conversations with others.  Additionally, as the old adage goes "practice makes perfect", and this is no exception.  The more your baby practices oral motor movements and sounds, the better he/she will become at producing them with volitional rather than spontaneously.

Check out Tip #5 here!

Happy imitating and talking!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #3!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

Here's Tip #3 (you can find Tip #2 here).

Bring attention to your face.  So much verbal and nonverbal communication is done with our faces.  Bringing attention to the central source of communication when your child is just learning the ins and outs of social skills, provides a simple way you can feel connected with your child while modeling the many things you can do with just your face.

How can I bring attention to my face?  What should I be doing?  You can really do anything that is entertaining to your baby and encourages sustained attention.  So, make silly faces, open your mouth wide, stick out your tongue, play with early developing sounds "ba", "ma", "da", "wa", etc.  Repeat these sounds with a variety of intonation illustrating a conversation.  I call this playing "face games" with your baby.

Tip:  The easiest way for me to do this with my own children is to lay my babies down on my lap so they when they are looking up they have no choice but to be looking at me and focusing on my face rather than on toys or the surrounding environment.

Why it works?  By bringing attention to your face you are showing your baby there are things we can do with our faces (seems pretty logical, right?).  When acting silly, your baby will find enjoyment in your face and in this type of play.  When producing sounds, you are modeling the babbling that is to come from your baby as he/she develops.  You are showing him/her that he/she can talk too and that talking is fun!  It's also imperative to have these moments of social connection with your infant as it teaches your child joint attention as well as a number of other nonverbal language skills such as making and maintaining eye contact, social smile, oral motor imitation, etc..

Tip:  I often tell parents that I work with, if this feels unnatural for you to do, take a few minutes every day after you brush your teeth or get out of the shower and make silly/funny faces to yourself in the mirror, while pretending you are talking to your baby.  After four or five days of this, you'll be ready to play face games with your baby.

Check out Tip #4 here!

Happy talking!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #2!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

So here's Tip #2 (find Tip #1 here).  You hear this all the time and if you want a child with strong communication and problem solving skills, good inferencing abilities and a large vocabulary, this is the way you make it happen.

Read often and Read repeatedly.  Read books to your child EVERY day!  Be sure to read and re-read the same books, over and over to your child.  I know it will seem tedious and monotonous at times, but it is very important to offer repeated readings of the same book to your child. As your child grows and begins to request books, it will become apparent which books he/she really enjoys. However, during the infant stage it will be up to you as a parent to remember to re-read books to your little one.

A word of caution when choosing books:  do not limit yourself to only picture books or very simple stories.  Even if your infant cannot yet talk or understand language, exposure to rich vocabulary, variations in prosody and intonation, and various narrative structures, will aid in further development of your child's auditory comprehension skills.  (Side note:  Also remember over time to change up books that your child has available to him/her so that he/she experiences various types of narratives.)

I remember when my oldest was 9 months old, he fell in LOVE with the cadence of the "Gingerbread Man" and he would knock over his basket of books, push all his other books out of the way, just to find this book for me to read.  Although he didn't understand every word, he loved hearing that book over and over and over again.  I must have read it 1000 times over the next 2 or 3 months, but he just couldn't get enough of it!  (And five years later, he still loves it!)  Don't get me wrong, as a mom, I desperately wanted to hide that book and if I ever had to read it again, it would be too soon. However, I knew it would help him in the long run and it just gave him such pleasure to hear it, that I couldn't say no.

Simple tip on how I foster daily reading:  Some parents like to schedule a set time (morning and night, or before nap time and bed, etc.) that they like to read to their children and if you are one of those parents I say, keep it up!  I like to do things a little differently.  I leave baskets/buckets of books around my house so that no matter where we are, I have immediate access to books.  I do not set up a time of day that I read with my boys, we just naturally gravitate to the book basket(s) as we play.  When my, now 8 month old, seems interested in his books by looking at them or by beginning to pull out books from his basket, I just snuggle with him and read some books.  We do this until he shows me, he is done by climbing off of my lap and heading for a new toy.  If he comes back, I read some more.  Some days he is more interested in books than others but because he has access to his books at all times, we never go a day without reading.  Oh, and I change our books every few weeks or so, while still keeping some of his favorites around.

Here is one of the book buckets we have around our house. This one has books for my 8 month old but my older child will often times read them to my little guy.

Why does it work?  Repeated readings has been shown to have a positive affect in the areas of vocabulary development, recalling story details, sequencing of a story, pre-literacy skills, early reading skills and much more.  So, I'd say it's worth the monotony!

Check out Tip #3 here!

Happy talking and reading!

How to get my infant to talk: Tip #1!

It's Tip Tuesday and since I receive questions about facilitating and eliciting language in very young children often from parents all over the world I thought I'd do a series offering tips and techniques I have done (and still do) with my own kiddos to get them talking!  You will notice there will be very few speech pathology terms used here as the goal of this series is to speak directly to parents.  However this information can be used by SLPs, early interventionists, or early childhood educators as well.  These tips are targeted for children 0-3 yrs (or cognitive equivalent).

So here's Tip #1.  It's probably the easiest to do and possibly the most obvious of them all but research will show you time and time again that it works.

What do you have to do to get your infant talking?

Talk to them.  Yes, it really is that simple sometimes!  Talk to your newborn!  Of course they cannot understand you, yet but how else will they learn?  Sometimes, as parents, we have so much going on in our heads, so much planning and organizing that we don't realize just how quiet we really are with our babies.  We tend to have conversations in our heads while our infants watch on, and we may in fact, be quieter than we thought we were.  I'm not pointing fingers here, as I have caught myself doing this very same thing.  However, the question we need to really ask ourselves is "How will my child see the value in making any sounds, if I don't model it first?".

You may be asking yourself, "So what do we talk to them about?".  Well talk about anything and EVERYTHING.  Talk about what you are doing (in the speech world this is called "self-talk"), what they are doing (in the speech world we call this "parallel talk"), what they are wearing, where you are going.  Share with them your grocery list.  Explain to them how you separate white from dark clothes prior to washing them.  Illustrate how you match up the same colored socks when folding the laundry. Show them how you crack an egg and whisk cake batter together before you pour it. Talk to them at home, in the car, in the grocery store.  Talk to them in your smooth loving way, and be sure to use your "motherese"/"parentese" (what experts call the sing-song way parents naturally speak to young children to capture their attention).  I understand talking to a baby that cannot or does not respond (yet), may not be a comfortable thing for all parents to do, but it is necessary.  I promise once you start doing this, it will become more and more natural within a few days.  Just remember, it really doesn't matter what you talk about, it just matters that you talk and talk often!

Why does it work?  You are your child's first communication partner so you are their model and their closest social connection to the world outside of themselves.  By your model, you are showing them there is a purpose to verbal communication.

If your baby is very quiet, simply ask yourself, "How much am I talking to (child name)?".  Remember talking in the presence of your child is not the same thing as talking to your child.  You may be talking to your spouse or your other children often but if you are not talking to your infant, your infant will not realize there is an expectation that he/she eventually use vocalizations (i.e. sounds, noises) to communicate.

Check out Tip #2 here!

Happy Talking!